Here Comes the Sun

Well, hi there!

Yes, it's me. I know it's been a while, but...

Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter.

Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here.

It was a long and cold winter, with a lot of bad news, sad stories, and personal and professional struggles. For so many I know, this past winter has been a season of loss, of change, of confusion. For me, it's been six months of medical visits, conflicting information, side effects, pain and frustration. I have sat down to write hundreds of times, only to find that all I had to express was fear and anger.

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun...

And I say it's all right.

Even after the deepest darkness, there is light. My medical team has finally found a combination of drugs that are easing the pain and inflammation. I am able to use my hands again, though only for short times before they get fatigued. I can sleep again-and I seem to be making up for lost time in that department! I am eating and exercising and, most importantly, spinning.

Little darling, the smiles returning to the faces.

Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here.

I must admit, it's been hard work to get here. And there is still a long way to go. But I am optimistic. I can share my stories again without becoming angry, or sliding into self-pity. I am softer, slower, and more in the moment than I have ever been.

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun…

And I say it's all right.

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.

I'm not sure where life is going to take me yet. I'm still learning my new limits and limitations. I'm weighing which aspects of my life to release, which to modify, and which to hold on to. But I'm moving forward and feeling optimistic for the first time in months.

Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting.

Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear.

Spring has finally arrived here in Fort McMurray, and with it has come sunshine and a parting of the dark clouds over my health and heart. The hurt that was keeping me from pursuing my passions is melting under the sun's rays. I've made string, I've finished projects that have languished in the studio since last fall, I've started writing again. I've dug in the garden and walked my dog every day. I'm up and around and ALIVE.

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun…

And I day it's all right.

~Lyrics to "Here Come the Sun" by George Harrison. Thank you, George, you've given me my new mantra.

http://youtu.be/C5E_zXbmrlM